I still feel like "the big girl"
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  1. #14
    Bronze Phenster
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    Wow!! You look incredible! Congratulations to you and your husband!

    Also, sorry you did not get any cake! That ****s!!
    Halloween Challenge
    October 7, 2009 - 192.6

    Goal Weight-157

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  3. #13
    Diamond Phenster libby0920's Avatar
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    AWW GIRL YOU AND YOUR DRESS ARE BEAUTIFUL! YOUR GLOWING


    2/10/08 - 3/08/08** -19 (Month 1 on Phen)
    3/15/08 - 4/05/08** -31 (Month 2 on Phen)
    4/12/08 - 5/03/08** -35 (Month 3 on Phen)
    5/10/08 - 5/31/08** -45 (Month 4 on Phen)
    6/07/08 - 6/28/08** -49 (Month 5 NO Phen)
    7/12/08- 7/26/08 ** -58 (Month 6 on Phen)


    month 5 results
    1st mini goal=215 met
    2nd mini goal=200 met
    3rd mini goal=185 met
    4th mini goal= 170

  4. #12
    Platinum Phenster cruisegirl1023's Avatar
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    WOW! YOu were a STUNNING bride!! You look fabulous and definitely NOT the big girl!!! Congratulations and best wishes for a blissful marriage!!
    ~2/13/08-7/24/08- Lost 17 lbs on my own
    ~7/25/08- Started Phen and lipo shots -196 lbs
    ~8/1/08- 189.1 lbs
    ~8/7/08- 187.5 lbs
    ~8/15/08- 184.5 lbs
    ~8/21/08- 179.3 lbs (16.7 first month)
    ~8/28/08- 176 lbs
    ~9/13/08- 173.2 lbs
    ~12/4/08- 173 lbs... doomed to always be 173

  5. #11
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    Thanks guys for all your kind words and stories. I wanted to say that my wedding was lovely with the exception of a controling officiant and I didnt get any of my cake ( I have been so excited about that darned cake for 3 months now!), everything else ran smoothly. and aside from my legs sweating like a pig I did feel beautiful. I attached a picture so you guys can see (it is only from me getting dressed, whent he photographer gives me a better one I will switch it out. But I wanted you all to see I made it through alive and mostly happy (still want me cake!) lol.
    Thanks Guys!
    1/1/2008- 198.6 (start weight)
    5/1/2008- 188.00 (lost 10.6 lbs on my own, SATRTED PHEN)
    6/2/2008- 177.2 (lost another 10.8 lbs and 12 in)
    7/1/08- 171 ( Lost 6.2 Lbs and 11 1/2 in)
    7/28/08- 166 (lost 5 lbs and 5 1/2 in)



    Before at 198lbs
    AT 167lbs

  6. #10
    Bronze Phenster erin_e's Avatar
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    I kinda understand where you are coming from. when i was in high school i was big, but forcd myself to loose 60 lbs. it took awhile but i was eventually down to 136 at my thinnest ever and i still felt fat. i had a belly and flabby thighs in my eyes i was still unhappy... this is the curse of growing up fat and being obese, its hard to see the good you have acomplished when you have spent so long focusing on the bad weight. we have acostomed ourselves to thinking we look hideaous, but truth is people will notice your loss more than anything, a total of 31.8 is alot and it is noticable! the people at your wedding are people that know and love you and remember where you started, and they will celebrate you amazing weight loss with you!
    not to mention the joy of getting married! noone is going to judge you on your weight, this is your time to be proud!

    congratz! try to relax, remind yourself how far you have come and enjoy this, it will be one of your best memmories!



    I think i lost my mind struggling to loose my extra weight.

  7. #9
    Silver Phenster RoxyStar's Avatar
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    Don't worry have you ever seriously heard anyone say "man, that bride looks FAT" I doubt it! The people at your wedding are your friends and family members that are there to celebrate with you not critisize you. Everyone will be focused on your beautiful dress (not the size of the body in it), the glow and smile on your face, your pretty hairstyle, etc... I've never seen a bride that didn't look stunning! Walk down that ailse with your head held high and confidence in your step, This is YOUR day, show them how proud you are of yourself and everyone else will feel the same. PS. I get married next week too!!!

    !!!

    1/9/09
    height: 5'6"
    weight: 146.00

  8. #8
    Diamond Phenster benson012094's Avatar
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    Yeah, congratulations on your wedding day. Hey, and cool to see a fellow Coloradoan. You know, we were voted the thinnest state. That's probably why we feel so fat, and really aren't, because we're around all these dang skinny, fit people!!!!
    -------------------
    You must be the change you want to see in the world. - Gandhi

  9. #7
    BronzyBella
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    Get ready for my tough love::::
    You need to get it together. I'm not talking about physically either, because you are doing a great job. You need to get yourself together, mentally! What you think, in your brain, is what the world will knock right back to you.

    You are looking in the mirror, right now, expecting for you brain to magically say "da.mn, I look good!"...that's NOT going to happen because you keep fighting your brain by finding all of the flaws. Look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself what you LOVE about your body. Tell yourself "I'm doing a he.lluva job with this weight loss stuff." You are your OWN cheerleader. If you don't cheer yourself on then everybody else can easily put you down (whether it be what they think of you are what they say).

    Let me tell you something....I am a big a.ss girl. I am 5'9". I was 307 at my heaviest and now 276. I carry all of my weight on top...and when I walk in a room, I know people see I'm big. Shoot, they're not blind....but I'm positive that what else they see is a big girl who looks good and feels good. So the fact that I am bigger doesn't even phase them....because IT'S NOT PHASING ME.

    Now, you really aren't big, but I can understand where you are coming from. But remember that regardless, you are beautiful and a great person. THAT is what people really see. So at your wedding, don't you dare let any negative thoughts about your image cross your mind. If it does, push that thought away and fill your brain with, "I am going to be the most beautiful bride they have ever and will see.....I'm am about to rock that aisle with all of my gorgeousness. All of my family, friends, and husband won't even be able to handle how good ALLLLLLL this woman (meaning you) looks!"----and when you say it....mean it....because it is true. And when i say "ALLLLL this woman," I mean ALL of you, every beautiful soft curve, every twinkle in your eye, and every bit of light you shine.

    Though you are molding and sculpting your body to be slimmer, you still MUST love what you have NOW---no matter what! This is cliche but true---tons of women would love to have your shape (shoot, I would lol). Many people are out there in the world and look at you walking through town, and think you are beautiful. So it is your JOB to own up to that responsibility and give the people what they want....You need to work every step you make and EVERY head you turn.

    You need to have positive thoughts in you to have positive energy around you. People feed off of that and along with that they see you as beautiful and bright. This method never fails.

    Enjoy your wedding day and love yourself!....cause if you don't, no one else will see your beauty.

  10. #6
    Gold Phenster dbethied's Avatar
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    i think we all go through this to some extent. it's like someone who is anporexic, skin and bones, and still sees fat in the mirror. they can't help it. when i started this thing at 202 i was so envious of people that were 170ish, 160.....i thought god! i would give anything to be there...... this morning i was 167.6 and tonight i was looking at my thighs when i was changing clothes and was absolutely disgusted. you and i have actually lost about the same amount of weight...almost exactly! people tell me all the time how much weight i've lost, but i still can't see it. your family is going to be looking at you thinking the same thing, "gosh, look how much weight she's lost!"......not the opposite! trust me. focus on your special day and i'm sure you will get compliments on your weight loss that day as well! congratulations!




    4-2-08 202.2 lbs SW (began b12/lipo shot 1 a week - no phen)
    4-9-08 193.6 lbs
    4-16-08 190.8 lbs
    4-23-08 188.0 lbs
    4-30-08 185.6 lbs
    5-7-08 185.6 lbs
    5-14-08 181.2 lbs
    5-21-08 178.8 lbs
    5-28-08 177.6 lbs
    6-04-08 176.8 lbs (stopped the shots. trying it on my own)
    6-16-08 175.6 lbs (went back to the shots today!)
    7-9-08 170.6 lbs (slowing down, but still going down!)

  11. #5
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    first of all congrats on your amazing loss and your wedding! youre going to be beautiful, no doubt.

    i think for anyone who has had a weight issue most if not all of their life, like me, its soooo hard to ever see yourself as you truly are just because a lot of time there is such a major self esteem issue. i think reconciling your inner self is ever harder that actually losing the weight. i do however believe that eventually you are going to start seeing yourself for who you really are and that dusgust is totally gonna fade. it just takes time for our minds to catch up with our bodies.

  12. #4
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    Congratulations on your upcoming nuptuals!!

    Again, BREATHE!! You have come so far! 32lbs is just incredible!! You are going to be a beautiful bride!

    The only thing that matter is that you are marrying the man of your dreams and that no matter what he loves you!

    Stress is a killer, and if you feel that the scale is not moving this week, it will!! Continue to do what you are doing and you will see results!!

    Best of luck to you and your future husband!

  13. #3
    Diamond Phenster gothprincess's Avatar
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    It's called Body Dysmorphia. I've had it(still have it). I went from 220lbs to 155lbs, but when I looked in the mirror, I still saw the 220lb me. That along with your upcoming wedding and all the stress with that will make you go crazy(ok, not really..lol). Take your picture(or have someone do it for you) and compare it to one of the 'old' you and see if you can see the difference then. That's what I had to do before I actually believed I had lost weight and wasn't the person I saw in the mirror.

  14. #2
    Silver Phenster NY L8DY's Avatar
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    Ok...first things first...Take a DEEP BREATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    You know, all off this stress and anxiety about your weight could really just be stemming from the fact that you are GETTING MARRIED in one week! Wow girl...that is sooo exciting..yet I'm sure it's pretty stressful too!

    You need to refocus on the fact that you are getting married to an amazing guy and all of your friends, family and loved ones are going to be there to wish you well! They are not going to look at you and pick you apart...they are going to talk about how beautiful you look and how happy you look!!!

    You need to try to not focus on your weight and just focus on your happiness!!!!

  15. #1
    Bronze Phenster
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    Unhappy I still feel like "the big girl"

    Ok,
    I have been working so hard at losing the weight. I Have lost 32lbs so far. which includes 6in in my waist, 5.5in in my hips and 4 in in my bust (consequently my cup size has gotten bigger some how, though- even though the circumference went down. Go figure). None of my clothes fit, even my new "skinny" clothes are too big now. My BMI, although still on the high side, says I am within normal range. So why when I look in the mirror am I still disgusted?

    I am getting married in a week, and I should be proud of what I have accomplished, but instead I am dreading all my friend and family to see me so "exposed" in a big white tent. My brain keeps telling me they will all be thinking- Oh my god look how fat she is, I thought she had lost weight, imagine how fat she must have been before!

    I dont know what to do, Why cant I see what has changed when I look in the mirror. I have become so obcessed about my weight that I have balanced my entire self worth on it. If it fluctuates upwards on the scale at any time, even if its just a little, I panic.

    anyone else gone through this? Any helpful insight to get me through my wedding? I have turned into a psycho!
    1/1/2008- 198.6 (start weight)
    5/1/2008- 188.00 (lost 10.6 lbs on my own, SATRTED PHEN)
    6/2/2008- 177.2 (lost another 10.8 lbs and 12 in)
    7/1/08- 171 ( Lost 6.2 Lbs and 11 1/2 in)
    7/28/08- 166 (lost 5 lbs and 5 1/2 in)



    Before at 198lbs
    AT 167lbs

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