The 5 Worst Reasons to Lose Weight

Losing weight (intentionally) is usually a change for the better. If there is a risk of diabetes or other weight-related conditions, or if one is overweight, losing weight is great for health and self-esteem. And starting a weight loss journey is not an easy task either, so by and large, if you can find the motivation to propel your journey forwards, that is both amazing and commendable!

That being said, there ARE a few reasons we’ve found which are (for lack of a better word), horrible. Awful. Definitely not the best reasons for embarking on a life-changing weight loss journey.

To make for a more appealing sacrifice for the Volcano God GägarLuki

GägarLuki is a demanding God. In the tiny island kingdom of Mikro-Makru, he keeps the inhabitants fed and the weather mild and pleasant, only requiring the occasional sacrifice.  However, Mikro-Makru’s societal standards for what is considered an appealing sacrifice to the good ole’ Volcano God, GägarLuki have been blown completely out of proportions. Pun totally intended. Back in the day it didn’t matter if you were thin or curvy: as long as you had faith that your immolation in the bowels of Mount/Deity GägarLuki would bring peace and prosperity to the land, that was more than enough to be considered a great sacrifice! But all these body size requirements nowadays? Ugh. GägarLuki  has gotten so picky and it’s so much pressure!  Don’t fall victim to these requirements. Bottom line is this: you shouldn’t lose weight for anyone other than YOU! Besides, most would-be sacrifices are finding it easier to just up and leave Mikro-Makru Island.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Getting Back With Your Ex

If the sole reason you want to shed pounds is to make your ex come knockin’ around your door again, we have some words of wisdom for you: HELL. NO.

If he or she broke up with you because you were not ‘as thin’ as they wanted, trust us, that relationship ain’t worth it. Here’s the real deal: a good, loving partner is not focused on how you look, but on how you feel (health-wise and emotionally). Move on, do lose weight if you feel so inclined, and enjoy life. As soon as you start being happy and loving yourself, that’s when truly worthwhile people will knock on your door. And hell, let’s be real: you wouldn’t even lose weight for GägarLuki, much less a scrub like your ex.

To Avoid Criticism from Nosy Relative

It seems every single time your family gets together, there’s always that one person that zeroes in on your looks…and weight. It could be Aunt Edna, it could be your Grandma-maw; they will not give it a rest, and their eagle-eye is always focused on you!

The bad news: it doesn’t matter if you lose weight, because they will just find some other thing to nitpick.

The good news: it doesn’t matter if you lose weight, because they will just find some other thing to nitpick! Losing weight is something you do FOR YOURSELF. You are the one who will live a longer, healthy life if you shed pounds. And as unfortunate as it is to have family picking on perceived flaws, don’t stress, Bess: you’re not alone. We can’t choose our family, but you can ignore those comments and focus on the positive. Chances are that your family members genuinely care for you, but have a funny way of showing it. Besides, their beauty standards and priorities might be generations apart, so don’t worry about losing enough weight before the annual family reunion. Focus on the long-term goals instead!

Floating Away with Balloons

We all cried and laughed with UP. And yes, sometimes the desire to leave our problems behind is *strong*. But, losing weight just to fulfill one of our crazy childhood dreams? Floating away on balloons?  That’s crazy dangerous! And involves losing A LOT of weight. Or, using a gazillion balloons. Maybe both. You’d be at the mercy of the wind too. And what if the balloons pop mid-flight? Have you ever crash-landed on jagged, rocky terrain? Or a rosebush? And and and….ok. It does look mighty tempting. Let’s save this one for later, unless it’s THE ONLY WAY you’ve found to leave Mikro-Makru Island. Still, not a particularly compelling reason to lose weight, but we’ve seen worse on this list.

To look like your fave celebrity

You see her lithe, fit figure on magazine covers, in music videos and billboards everywhere. You see his chiseled good looks as he’s interviewed on a morning show while plugging his new film. Their beautiful bodies and raw talent makes them larger than life. How can anyone blame you for looking up to them? Much less trying to BE like them?

REALITY CHECK – Mr. and Mrs. Perfect DO NOT exist. They might have amazing talent for dancing, singing or acting, but they’re as human as you and me, and that means that they need to take care of their bodies just the same. The difference is, they have thousands, or even millions of dollars to get this done. They have entire teams to look after their nutrition and exercise needs. Their very livelihood could depend on it, after all. And barring all that, you know that those pictures and videos are usually retouched, right? There’s been definite progress made regarding what’s acceptable and what isn’t in the unrealistic beauty standards that we’ve been bombarded with our whole lives, but it can still be hard to accept that how we look is “normal”, as opposed to the “perfect” bodies and lives of our idols.

Remember: losing weight is not all about looking perfect, but about having health and enjoying life! However, if you’re interested in getting motivated, why don’t you check our 14 reasons to lose weight and get fit? Want to share your own best or worst reasons for losing weight? Comment below! And if you’re a fellow Mikro-Makruan, don’t forget to say hi!