A Teenagers Expierence...

**Nikki Bekki** · September 10th, 2005, 10:17 AM

My Name Is Nicole And I'm 17 Years Old & A Senior In High School! I Used Phentermine Back When I Was In 8th Grade & Lost 30lbs... But I Wasn't Excersizing Or Watching What I Ate So I Gained It All Back Plus More When I Stopped Taking It! I Just Started Taking Phentermine Again On Sept. 1st, 2005 and I've Already Lost 13lbs And I Am Watching What I Eat & Excersizing... So I'm Pretty Happy!! I Just Want To Be Happy Again, It Kills Me To See Me So Fat Cuz Of How Depressed I Can Get!!! It's All Good Though... I Got Support And I Know I Can Do This! I Need To Lose About 60 More Lbs Before Prom Which Is In April....

**Choco-cat** · September 10th, 2005, 10:22 AM

Welcome to the boards, and good luck to you!

Choco-cat

**estrella218** · September 10th, 2005, 10:28 AM

Good Luck! This is great place to come to for support! Did your DR prescribe Phen when you were in the 8th grade? They are so hesitant about giving it to adults, it's amazing they gave it someone so young! Well, just keep that Prom dress on your mind everytime you head to the fridge or don't want to work out! It will get you motivated!

**MustangSally** · September 10th, 2005, 04:01 PM

Wow...good luck...make sure you drink that water and eat your 1200 a day

**Nikki Bekki** · September 11th, 2005, 06:29 AM

Thank You All & My Doctor Did Prescribe It To Me When I Was In The 8th Grade... Its Kinda Strange That Dr. Hesitate Giving It To Adults... But Mine Recommended It To Me... So I Tried It!!

**missus** · September 11th, 2005, 07:09 AM

Hey Nikki Bekki, I see you live in St Paul Park, I'm in Minneaolis. Just wanted to drop in and wish you luck, and can't wait to see your prom pics girl.

What school do you go to in St Paul Park?

Missus

**2much2pack** · September 11th, 2005, 07:18 AM

Nikki Bekki...Good luck to ya girl, this is a great place to get support!! Were all here for ya!!

~Shan :heart:

**Nikki Bekki** · September 11th, 2005, 07:29 AM

I Go To Park High School... I Went To Prom Last Year For My Junior Year & I Love My Dress, But I Didn't Look As Good I Wanted Especially Compared To My Best Friends...

This Is Our Picture Before Prom...I'm The One In The Purple Dress...

**missus** · September 11th, 2005, 07:43 AM

I think you looked splendid girl. And the dress is georgous.

I'll be rooting for you sweetie. You can lose it.

My daughter graduated from Park Center in 2003. Small world, isn't it?

BTW, you are a very pretty young lady.

Keep us posted.

Missus

**Clutch** · September 11th, 2005, 08:12 AM

You can do it! You've got a great start, don't look back now!

Nice to meet you, welcome aboard!

-C

**MzSexyZetaKitty6** · September 11th, 2005, 08:17 AM

You can do it!!! And those were some bad shoes girl!!!!! My goal is my college graduation which is in May, so we are almost goal date-buddies...

**utopia** · September 11th, 2005, 10:55 AM

You are a doll!!! You have the cutest smile
You can do anything you set your mind to

**Nikki Bekki** · September 13th, 2005, 06:52 AM

Thanks All!!! I've Been Sick for the past 2 days, and my throat is closed up to the point that i can't even talk so i can't take my phentermine... so i just have to make sure i watch what i eat and try to work out as much i can!!! I'm sick and tired of being sick... but i'm not letting it hold me back from losing weight!!!!

You all made my day... thanks a bunch!!! here another picture for y'all of me and my best friends...

**This Is Me & One Of My Best Friend Katie... Without Her I Wouldn't Be Alive Today**

**This Is Me & Steph From Last Week... I Love My Stephy Bunny**

**missus** · September 13th, 2005, 07:05 AM

Sorry to hear you weren't feeling well. Get better.

Nice pics.

Missus

**Nikki Bekki** · September 19th, 2005, 11:34 AM

Everything Is Going Well Now....I'm still sick But I've Lost More Weight... YAY! 208..... Since September 1st

<a href="http://www.3fatchicks.com/weight-tracker/index.php"><img src="http://www.3fatchicks.com/weight-tracker/img/heartbar/yinyang01/lb/225/150/208/.png" border="0"></a>

**missus** · September 19th, 2005, 11:57 AM

Hey girl, now that's what I'm talkin about.

Glad you're feeling better. When are you gonna pick out that prom dress? YOu are getting closer and closer to that goal. Keep it going sweetie.

Congrats on that huge weight loss. :heartpump:

Missus

**Choco-cat** · September 19th, 2005, 12:01 PM

Glad to see you back around!

Take it one day at a time babe.

:heart: Choco-cat

**Nikki Bekki** · September 21st, 2005, 02:47 PM

I've Been Slackin Lately.... I Don't Know Why, But I Need To Get To My Goal By April... Well Its Storming Out So I'm Gonna Shut Down My Computer... Tornados Scare The Crap Out Of ME!

**Skydreama** · September 21st, 2005, 03:00 PM

Good luck on your goal, I am sure u can make it!

**Nikki Bekki** · October 7th, 2005, 02:00 PM

So alot has happened to me in the past 2 weeks. I was sent last friday to harbor shelter for running away and not going to school! so I haven't taken my phentermine like it's prescribed and I haven't excersized at all! I'm to scared to get on the scale... I've let myself get into some drugs that arnt too good, so I don't think I'm going to take phentermine for awhile! so I think this is one of my last posts... everything has gone down hill and I gotta figure some stuff out for myself instead of everyone fixing em for me... so Peace out everyone!

**missus** · October 7th, 2005, 02:46 PM

Nikki, don't do this. You can get back on phen, get that prom dress and graduate. What do you need? I will be here for you. There is a reason as to why you are running away. Whatever it is, it can be fixed. All you have to do is ask for help. pm me, I'll give you my email and I know of lots of agencies that will help. Or if youwant,we can talk. YOu are smart, bright, strong and can do this.

And, whatever you do, those drugs that arnt too good? Let em alone. The only drug you need is maybe phen. HUgs to you sweetie. Please don't let this be your last post. Somebody luvs you and wants you to be all right.

Here's a big hug

Missus

**Gettinskinny** · October 7th, 2005, 02:57 PM

Nikki girl please be strong and stay away from those nasty drugs they get people NOWHERE! Your a gorgeous girl and If you wana loose weight then try to stick with the Phen...though it does seem to magnify some people with depression issues. So use it carefully maybe try some counseling through that place you mentioned and going for a long walk/run can really help promote those endorphins!!! But of course ya gotta deal with those underlying issues. Be strong, big hugs!!

**lose4river** · October 7th, 2005, 05:12 PM

Hi Nikki-

Your posts break my heart. Please continue taking the Phen and get rid of the other drugs. You are a very strong and determined girl. Please stick to this.

**missus** · October 8th, 2005, 05:14 AM

bump

**EBONY POETESS** · October 8th, 2005, 06:27 AM

Nikki baby I'll be praying for you :heartpump:
Please go back home :heartpump:
I don't know your situation but drugs and running away only adds more problems.
There are some crappy people in this world and I for one don't want them to misuse you.
Being young we are sometimes easily influenced by things that seem fun and exciting but it's not.
I dont want you to become an addict,or pregnant used and abused to the point where you dont know where you came from or where you are going.
God, boo you are so young and beautiful and you have your whole life ahead of you :heartpump:
There are programs and school councelers with people who will truly help you.
This is simply a test of your strength through trials and tribulations.
God put you here to be happy and live your life to the fullest! You could go to college and work and pretty soon you'll have your own.You could be anything you want to be!What do you desire the most?Whatever it is it's not impossible to reach.Dreams of love,prosperity and happiness are merely pictures of your future destiny :heartpump:
You are a princess who's is waiting to be crowned.
Grab a hold of life,your life and love yourself and let GOD do the rest!
PLEASE DONN'T THINK I DONT UNDERSTAND I WAS ONCE YOUR AGE JUST YESTERDAY OK MAYBE THE DAY BEFORE YESTERDAY :blabla:

I have a poem for you

I never thought it mattered much when I cried alone
Until you came and put my tears on your throne
You whispered with the angels about the secrets of my soul
So you sent me a warm river of faith for my blessings to float

You said; if I ever thought my heart went unnoticed just ask
And I'll remind you of times you shared your smile with the hurt and lonely
The times your laughter made a homeless spirit acknowledge me
The times you emptied your heart to inspire their dreams

I remember when you gave so much of yourself you forgot how to feel free
When you wanted love but they only took what their eyes could see
Cause their souls weren't deep enough to appreciate your beauty
When trust seemed like a trivia question so you prayed to me for an answer

You said,GOD why is it so hard for people to love me for me?
Why is my soul so pleasant and my heart so free?
I know you made the ingrediants for me
Silent beauty
Heart of gold
Mind of peace
But yet, no one cares to see
How come nobody compares to me?

And I said you're right my child
Nobody compares to you because angels never repeat
And I never make mistakes so don't you ever change
And if the world is not ready for you
It's because you're already complete :heartpump:
GOD bless you boo

**AmberSkyy** · October 8th, 2005, 06:46 AM

Hey Nikki Bekki... I hope you come back and read all of this... We are all worried for you!

Even though most of us are a little older than you, it dosent mean we dont remember what it means to be in your shoes...

Parents drive you crazy, friends and boyfriends stab you in the back and break your heart, everything normal is boring and that makes drugs seem exciting and fun....

BUT please! Take it from someone who has done all the things you are going through>>> and more! I ran away for awhile when I was about 17, right after my boyfriend committed suicide>> a week after I broke up with him. I made some bad decisions because I didnt care what I had to do to feel better or forget my pain so I could "relax" and have a good time....

Nikki I am still paying for those wrong choices I made over 10 years ago! You look like a strong girl, who has a sensible head on her shoulders, and KNOWS what is right and wrong!

Its not always easy to do the right things, and make the good choices, and thats why you talk to ppl with an outside opinion, and gain some new perspective.

Whatever is happening in your life will fade away eventually, assuming it is not a tragic situation, that is... and you can emerge from it a stronger person, or you can slide deeper into trouble...

I hope you come back and let us talk with you, we really do care, and want to help you if you need some direction or advice.

I really liked all the pictures of you and your girlfriends, you are such a beautiful girl and your smile is so bright... I hope you can hold on to that beautiful smile and get through your trials unscarred....

We are here for you, so dont hesitate and dont be shy... Im sure there is NOTHING most of us havent seen, heard, or done ourselves, AND WE WONT JUDGE YOU!

Im sending you a Private Message, so I hope to hear from you soon...

Take care, and I am praying for you girly!

Love, Ashley :heartpump:

**missus** · October 8th, 2005, 12:48 PM

bump

Amber and Ebony, such beautiful words ladies.

Nekki, come back sweetie.

Hugs

Missus

**jennklb** · October 8th, 2005, 01:36 PM

I agree with Amber and Ebony, you ladies said it all! Nekki, I hope you come back and let us know your alright. No one has to do it alone, we are here to listen or read and respond as the case may be!

Jen

**Nikki Bekki** · October 10th, 2005, 06:18 PM

Hi Again.... Well Okay! I did come back, I never thought I Would, But I did. I want to thank you all for your concerns and thoughts! I've tried counseling and everything else, I don't care anymore! No matter what I do, I always do something wrong.... I get blamed for stuff that has nothing to do with! Such as my mom blaming me for her and her boyfriend breaking up... that I have no control over what so ever.
I'm not back on the Phentermine because my mom hasn't refilled it, but I still have lost more weight! I weigh 203 now.... 22 LBs. lost since Sept. 1st... so that makes me kinda happy!

I want to thank you all again, but if your family stood right in front of you and told you that you weren't going to graduate & that my DREAM IN LIFE is all a fantasy... that I won't be able to do what I want with my life! I don't know... Well, Its like 11:09pm here In MN, so I'm Going To Head To Bed Soon! I'll Talk To You All Later... Also I Have Some New Pictures For You All To See... To Show You I Am Still Well, Drugs Or No Drugs... I'm Still Healthy!

My friend took this one when I was in a bad mood!

I Was At The James J. Hill House In St. Paul

I don't remember what I was doing in this picture...

Well Peace In Chicken Grease Y'All!
***Nicole Lee***

**jaspernotting** · October 10th, 2005, 07:24 PM

"...but if your family stood right in front of you and told you that you weren't going to graduate & that my DREAM IN LIFE is all a fantasy... "

Nikki I really don't know who can say such a word. Especially if it's family... believe in yourself. You have come so far and you know you are NOT going to be who that person going to make you become.

Glad you are still healthy, without health we cannot enjoy what life have to provide. You are precious, so make the best our of your life! Good luck to you girl!

**missus** · October 11th, 2005, 01:50 AM

Hey Nikki, so good to see you back sweetie. Yes, you are right, family can be cruel, but there are others who care and would never say this to you. Reach down inside and know that you can do this. It's what's inside that counts, and you possess so much beauty Nicole. Keep coming back, let us know how you are doing, we care about you. I'm just 9 miles away from you. Pm me if you need me.

BTW, luv the pics. Can tell you lost those 22 pounds. Keep it going.

Hugs

Missus

BTW, I'm looking forward to seeing your graduation announcement, prom dress and all.

**EBONY POETESS** · October 11th, 2005, 04:45 AM

You know how to get them back for their unkind words?Prove them wrong!Graduate,go to college,lose your weight,love yourself as God does and words would not being to express the envy they will have for you :heartpump: :heartpump:
My mama was very cruel when I was growing up and I did what seemed to be everything right but something was always wrong because she was unhappy so she wanted to make me unhappy too.
She blamed me for her music career not being what it should have been but I know better now.
Hell I knew better then but I didn;t know how to express myself without fear of getting hit or fear of her not loving me if I questioned it.
You are becoming a woman with dreams and you have your whole life ahead of you.I was put through so much but somehow GOD had a plan for me.
I have a career and a beautiful daughter and home and I'm at peace with most of the things in my life.You have to do what's best for you because pretty soon you'll be on your own and you are who comes first!Dont ever let anyone tell you something is impossible !It's their excuse because they didn't try hard enough :heartpump:
Good luck girl and btw you are really pretty :heartpump:

**heartland** · October 11th, 2005, 05:36 AM

Nikki~~~ Girl, you are sooo pretty!!! I love your pictures!
Ya know what i regret most in my life?
Not graduating! I could just kick myself---i had one more year. I'm 33 and I still regret it. When we are teenagers we can't see the big picture. (i couldn't anyway)
Work hard NOW so you will not have to LATER.

**Nikki Bekki** · October 19th, 2005, 01:02 AM

I'm back again... But i'm for sure that this is one of the last times I will be back. My mom is dropping me out of school 2day because she can... I know i'm not gonna succeed in life, so whats the point in wasteing everyone elses time... but yay! I'm going to go finish getting ready for one of my last days of school, peace out y'all!