Ok, I want to place my order for my mail order phen pal. I would prefer him to be somewhere between 5'10" and 6'0" (I mean really, any taller is overkill with my height), athletic shape, not too muscular... nice buns

Must have a nice smile....yadda yadda yadda
Ok, so really... what up with the phen pal stuff? Is someone gonna send me some free phen in the mail? Or maybe hand me down clothes that don't fit anymore? Hmmmm....I'z a confus-ed lil pup now
BUT DADDY, I WANT A PHEN PAL NOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW
(anyone remember willy wonka?)
<B>"If all my friends were to jump off a bridge, I wouldn't jump<BR>with them, I'd be at the bottom to catch them"</B>