need advice

[june65]

I have a daughter that is 16 and is a binge eater, she is at least 40 pds overweight right now, and gripes all the time. I have talk to her about healthy eating and all the other stuff a hundred times. she is not active either. except softball season. i dont know what to do. she eats at least 5000 cals a day that i know of. I was never overweight untill i got ill 4 yrs back and could do nothing. now im ok and started my journy to lose the weight. she does not know im on phen and i dont want her to think a pill is the answer. i also exercise. i cant get her to do anything. im worried because if she keeps this eating up she will get bigger and bigger. need advice? sorry so long but could go on and on. worried mom

[FireplaceNut]

Wow June!

I think that it is good not to tell her. I agree with the "pill" being the answer and it's not something to imbed in the mind of a 16 year old for certain.

Maybe you could just have very healthy food around the house so she is not tempted and at least when she eats the 5000 calories (that was about what I was eating) it will be healthy food. Maybe also offer to get up early and exercise with her befoe school (walk?). Maybe buy her a gym membership and if she goes at least 4 times a week she can get a new sweater or something?

Much luck to you! Happy New Year!

[Birthgrl]

Okay..I understand what you are saying, and I hear you..but at 16 you shouldn't be tip toeing around this with her...She is old enough to understand, and you have to set the limits for her.
I know when they go to school they eat all sorts of mess, but when she gets home you should be able to control what she is getting.
You should not have to bribe her to take care of herself.
I have a daughter, and I feel I will have those issues with her, simply because her dad thinks I should let her eat what she wants because she is so young, but I have to tell him, she is fighting Genetics here..Mine and his...He has always been a slender man, and I was too up until childbirth ;)
I think it is important for them to establish good eating habits, and healthy livestyles while they are young, so they won't have to fight the fight we are fighting.

Send her outside to run errands, to clean out something, to walk the dog. You two go to the track and walk and talk...go for a walk after school, or go to the local YMCA or Wellness center and go for a swim, take up a water aerobics class together...It shouldn't be an option.
Tell her you love her and are concerned, and that this is what you are going to do together.
But I would not tell her about the Pill. :blabla:

[AthenaZG]

I make my kids exercise. We have a treadmill and I make them get on it four days a week. It's just part of their daily responsiblities. My oldest cleans the kitchen, helps with laundry, and gets on the treadmill. My youngest picks up the bathroom, picks up her Barbie mess (which happens daily), and gets on the treadmill. We homeschool so there's not gym class for them. I am the gym. And it's my job to make sure they get exercise.

I did give them winter break off. And they've had fun playing with all of their holiday stuff and videos games, but they know Monday the break is over! And it's time to get back into a routine.

I'm honest with them. I tell them, "I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did. I don't want you to take your health for granted. By getting exercise everyday you will feel better, you'll have less stress and anxiety, and you'll have more energy. AND! And this is the most important thing to me, you'll be able to really enjoy some food indulgences every once in awhile because you take good care of yourself."

My kids see me struggle with my weight. I'm honest with them and tell them, "I really messed up in the *take care of myself* department. I should have never let myself gain this much weight. I was self indulgent, I lacked self discipline." I think they see that I made mistakes and I'm trying to fix them.