[Dreamsicle]

marie ,jely, renee and carmen thanky ou so much for the thoughts and prayer they mean so much.The docotr said it is from a middle ear infection that has swollen and pressing against my 7th cranil nerve ( facial nerve) he said that as far as getting back to normal it will take time it depends on how damaged the nerve is he said I have to go to rehab to try to learn how to use my muscles again. It is so hard to drink something without it getting on my.. it is really frustrating and depressing and I go through times of getting so mad and then I cry. he said that there is a high chance of it going away but not to get my hopes up because there are times when somethings dont change it a few signs will be permanent and then few people dont heal at all.A girl friend called me and told about a girl she worked with got it and they told her it would go away but her face is like that still 2 years later ( I thought that was kinda crappy of her to tell me that so soon) she not a really good friend. I try to stay optimistic and think positive thoughts it is just really hard. I dont know if I told any of you before but my life hasnt been so great... when I was just starting to walk my mom left me ouside with some people who had a camp fire burning and did not watch me.. I walked right over to it and bent down picked up some sticks burned my hands I had surgery from 3 up to 14 years old.. my mother wasnt best mom in the world she was young and didnt wants kids she tried to get an abortin bu my grandmother wouldnt let her , she tried to put me up for adoption but my grandmother would let her my aunt was 13 nd she took better care of me then my mom.. then when I was 7 she met my second step dad married and that was amistake.. he abused me til I was 15 everyway you could think of my little brother and I was sent to foster care home after being there for a little while my litle brother left to go live with his grandfather and I was still there at the home which I promise you it was like the cinderella story no joke without the prince.. the state shut their home down I went to live with a lady accross the street for a year then my best friend for a year then on my own got a job and apt at age 18 It has been really hard I have my husband and my little brother but that is it my mother had a chance to get us back because she wasnt guilty of anything when I was 16 but she just disappeared.. it is liek she has so much guilt.. I found her a few times but she keeps moving so at age 19 I let bigons be bigons and left everyone behind all I keep in touch with is my brother.My husbands family dislikes me because he was dating a girl before he met me and she became pregnant he tried to work it out with her but they couldnt get a along his little girl was 1 when I met him she is now fixing to turn 9 I have been there almost all her life and I am really good to her.. but they didnt want my husband to be with anyone but her.. so the family thing isnt so much up my alley all though I would give anything to have a warm hug from my mother right now..I feel like saying what else... what else is going tohappeen to me because I dont feel I cant take anymore I just feel really crappy right now and I apologize to those of you that feel I gave TMI but to those of you that read thank you .. you mean alot to me. I wish you all the best! Sorry it there are typos hard to see with one eye

Renee that baby is beautiful!!!